Fallen off the wagon

Here it is the beginning of a new year and I've literally fallen off the wagon. With weight loss that is. Here's the story:

I was doing well in October with keeping off the weight, exercising regularly and I was super happy. Many things happened after October 16th. First, I was fired from Core Fitness in Iowa City. It was a shock to my system. I had worked there for 4 3/4 years. I loved being a fitness instructor there. I knew everyone in my classes. I also tried to learn everyone's names in the gym itself. I put my heart into that place. I felt that I'd have that job for a really long time, it was awesome. I seriously loved to teach fitness.


Then one day, My husband looked into a new gym opening up in North Liberty, Iowa. He wanted to teach there because the pay was better, plus he felt he would be treated better overall. Long story there, but basically the fitness coordinator that took over last Nov. wasn't nice to Jason. She was rotten and talked behind both our backs. (it was like High School all over again) Jason was eager to leave Core for the reason of poor management from the Owners (who fought constantly in front of gym members and staff) and for the reason of the fitness coordinator who seriously didn't know what she was doing and her unprofessional behavior was just bringing the gym down.

One day the entire fitness staff was e-mailed and in this e-mail it stated that we all had to give our availability to the fitness coordinator and also state whether or not we were looking into that new gym.

Jason being the honest guy he is, told the F.C. that he was indeed planning on leaving Core, but not for 5 more weeks and he still wanted to teach at Core.

You would think that a gym management team would want to keep an instructor like Jason. He had the highest number of attendees than any morning class ever. His step class was super popular. So you would think that the management team would offer Jason more money to stay there. Because as it was we got paid crap. We taught because we loved to teach. Definitely not for the money.

However it wasn't like that. Two days after Jason wrote his letter to the F.C., he was fired. Then I was fired.

Why???????

I struggled for that for quite a while.

So that's the beginning of the story.

Then we went to Utah for Jason's brother's wedding. I didn't want to go. Well I did, but I didn't. See it this way . . .

Traveling by Van loaded with 6 children all smashed together in the back. Fighting almost the entire way and on top of that, we really didn't have the money to go on this trip. Several financial things had happened to us that same week.

However I knew that since his parents hadn't visited us in Iowa since we started living there and it had now been 8 years that if we didn't make the trip to Utah, then our children may go another 2-5 years without seeing their Grandparents. That's not fair to any child.

It ended up being a very depressing trip overall. I was suffering emotionally over being fired just the week before and I was crushed more than I thought. Then my mother-in-law asked if I was going anorexic. By the way I'm 5 foot 4 inches tall, so 137 pounds (which was my weight when I was there) is far from anorexic. Still totally within normal range. I really don't understand why she asked me that?????????

I was also on 3 medicines (Allegra, Premarin, and a B.C. pill) Apparently I was taking too much estrogen, and it messed with my system. I became super depressed. I think between the combination of being fired and emotionally drained, and then the trip to Utah I didn't want to make but did anyway, then the medicine I was on that wasn't right for me is what made me stop caring for a while.

I became more and more depressed. I recognized this one night and called the hospital. I just wanted to talk to a nurse. All said and done, I have now seen my doctor, gotten off all the medications I was on, started on a new birth control pill called Yasmin, saw a psychologist, talked to a really good friend, journaled my emotions, exercised more and I feel 8000 times better.

Between October and now I have eaten so many sweets and bad things for my body it's completely crazy. I have not been nice to my body. I have let my body gain 11pounds. Today at the plasma center where I donate I weighed in at a whopping 148. Just 3 months ago I was 137.

Time to recover emotionally and physically.

I am ready to start over. Next week I will blog how my week has gone and hopefully I'll report at least a pound gone and still happy emotions.


Everyone deserves a new start. Here is mine . . .